All sorts of goodbyes

I've been walking around the Slippery Rock campus for the past few days, soaking it all in. God used this place to get me through so many things; to bring me to new things; and best of all, to reveal Himself to me in such a deep and passionate way. These tan walls have witnessed tears of joy and pain, and the outside air has swept over me to renew my spirit. This whole nostalgia business seems really cheesy to me, and yet I will forever be thankful for the opportunity to be here. I have met some beautiful people, and shared some wonderful memories. I've been able to dance my heart out for my King, and I finally know what it means to worship Him.

I have a few regrets, but I wouldn't trade this experience for the world. I can't question the Lord's call on my life, but I've recently been wondering why He is chosing to take me away now. My heart is torn, pulled by both the desire to be home and the desire to stay. I know without a doubt, though, that the plans I had are not what He has in store for me. I have no idea why yet, but that's the fun part. 

Picture it: the man you love, leading you through the woods with his hands over your eyes. "Where are we going?" "You'll see... just be patient." The thrill of not knowing where you are being taken is almost too much to bear, but you cling on to him and trust him because you know how much he loves you. The only thing that matters is that he is the one leading you, protecting you, holding you.

Psalm 37:4 - "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart."

Much to say

My life is slowly changing

Taking new shape

Breathing new air

My eyes are just a little more focused

Opened to see

Loving the view

My heart is somewhat bigger

Swelling to fit

Praising to love

My feet have stopped and turned about

Searching the path

Waiting for words

My face is lifted in glorious peace

Arms stretched out

All to you

SO much has been changing in my life these past few months. The only thing I can blame is the incredible goodness of the Lord Almighty. He is my strength and my life, and I will stretch out my arms to Him forever and ever. My major is changing, my school is changing... my plans are not my own anymore, and that's perfectly fine with me. My Love knows exactly what's best, so I'm clinging onto Him as He soars oh so gracefully.

My Palm Sunday was a little different this year, and I'd like to share some tidbits. The story of the triumphial entry was read, as usual, and I prepared myself for the typical celebration of the salvation that was soon to come after Jesus spent some time on the donkey. However, Pastor Bob had some new ideas... some sad ideas... he talked about weeping.

Why, on such a glorious occasion, would my pastor want to focus on weeping? I had never paid any significant amount of attention to the statement in Luke 19:41 before: "As he approached Jerusalem and saw the city, he wept over it..." Through Bob's half-hour of teaching, I have become ever so aware of the desperation surrounding me. Everywhere I look, people are longing for something... and sadly, they are looking in every direction for fulfillment but the right one. Jesus wept for the city... for the people... for their hearts. Ultimately, He knew what would happen in the end; how many lost souls would reject His sacrifice. 

Weeping. Well, physical or not, I am crying. Every inch of my body longs for the time when the friends I so dearly love will find what they are seeking: rest and forgiveness from all the clutter in their hearts. Weeping is prayer; when I cry, I share my heart with my Daddy. For healing, for salvation, for comfort, for peace... they need Him. And I cry. "Oh, that my heart would break for what breaks Yours!"